When July Is Forthcoming

It's America's birthday, e'erbody!

Don't you hate it when you get to the party and/or bakery and everyone's started drinking without you?

Of course, most folks know today simply as:

4th July of.

Or July 4th of.

Your choice.

Yes, friends, today is a day to salute all nations, but mostly America. Preferably with a glorious three-hour finale, condensed into a minute and a half. (OBSCURE MUPPET JOKE HEYOOOO)

"You are all WEIRDOS."

Today is a day of fireworks, fun, and patriotic grilled meat... um... cakes. Obviously.

"You know what this 4th of July sh*t grill needs? A FUZZY PURPLE BORDER HEYOOOO!"
- a drunk baker, probably

(John: "You already used the 'heyooo' thing, take that out."
Me: IT'S MY BLOG HEYOOOOO
John: "...."
Me: "Pass me my drink, farm boy. HEYOOOOO."
John: "No. You've had enough tea."
Me: "NOOOOOOOO HEYOOOOO"
John: "I've quit better jobs than this.")

So whatever you're up to today, folks, just remember:
Today is also the day we celebrate the great Will Smith movie.

Just as soon as we remember how to spell it.

Thanks to Matthew C., Julie A., Samantha W., Katie S., & Ashleigh G. for reminding me what movie to watch tonight. HEYOOOOO.

*****

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