Bad Giraffe! BAAAAD!

When your last name is Hammer, there's really just one way to nail a baby shower cake.

And that way...

...is NOT LIKE THIS.

Aw, crap.

Still, at least everyone can get a chuckle over sh*tty "hamer"s. Imagine being the only one at a baby shower to see something wrong with this cake topper - which, incidentally, ALSO involves nailing things:

o.0

Er, look, I realize my mind's in the gutter often enough to sprout legs and start scurrying, but seriously... HOW DID THE BAKER NOT SEE THIS?

Ahem.

Quick palate cleanser: look how pretty!

(By Sweet On You Cakes)

Aaaand back to reality:

Oh, BABY.

Almost makes you long for the days of hammer logs and randy giraffes, eh?

Thanks to Elizabeth H., Emily S., & Robin D. for the capital wreckage.

*****

P.S. Something about this post reminded me of those shiny blue balls that keep your produce fresh. Have you seen these?

Blueapple Freshness Saver Balls

Just pop one in your crisper drawer and the other in your fruit bowl, and these will absorb the ethylene gas that quickens ripening, so all your fruits and veg stay fresh longer. Seems like witchcraft, I know, but go check the thousands of rave reviews: apparently they really work! Each set lasts 3 months, and you get 2 apples for $13.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Tonight At The Lucky Stardust Lounge

"You... are... so beautiful..."

"...to me."

"Thank you. Thank you very much."

[Leaning on piano]

"You... are... soooo beautiful..."

"...to meeee."

"The Goldmans, everyone! Fifty years today! Aren't they adorable?

"Can't you SEEE-EEE-EE?!?"

[sliding to front of stage on knees]

"You're... ev'ry-thing I HOPED for!"

[grimacing in pain]

"You're

EVERYTHING

I neeeeeeeeee..."

"...eeEEED!"

[winking at waitress]

"You... are... so beautiful..."

"Toooo... meeeeEEEEE."

Thank you, Nia C., Krystal C., Karen R., Julie R., Alison V., and Joshua P. Thank you so much. No, really. Thank you. Really. You're too much. Thank you. Tip your waitress!

*****

P.S. I agree, you COULD do a better job yourself. So have you tried these new silicone "piping bulbs?"

8 Pc Bulb Decorating Kit

Y'all. Go read the reviews; these things are apparently total game-changers. Easy to fill, clean, no more leaking piping bags, AND they fit all the Wilton metal tips we already have! I don't do much cake decorating these days, but I do pipe caulking for crafts, so I'm excited to try these out.

******

And from my other blog, Epbot: