Your Goose Is Cooked, But The Turkey Is Traumatizing

Ever wonder why bakers keep making cakes that look like cooked turkeys?

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Or rather, cakes that are supposed to look like cooked turkeys?

 They just, I dunno... make me a little uncomfortable.

Linda+Msh.ow.turkey.jpg

Look at those fleshy leg cannons. It's not right.

Here's one for people who say turkey is too dry:

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EXTRA MOIST

And let's talk about how funny they look from the front!

Or is this the back?

::head tilt::

You know what, let's not think about that too long.

The important take-away here is it looks like a bald guy who's been hit in the face with a pecan pie. A naked bald guy. Wearing wrist ruffles. Who has no legs.

And once you see this as a 10 gallon cowboy hat, there's no going back:

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Howdy, poultry.

Even when bakers get it right, and the cake looks like an honest-to-goodness turkey, I have some issues:

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For one, I will never look at Pigs in a Blanket the same.

 (Whyyy are they there??)

Listen, bakers, I think I speak for all humanity when I say NO ONE wants to see two cooked turkeys on their tables this Thanksgiving. So please, just give the people what they want!

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MORE POO-WANGS!


Thanks to Amanda S., Linda M., Robin R., Jennifer G., Nathan A., Alexandra M., & Melanie C. for that fowl content.

 *****

OK, so it's no pig-in-a-blanket, but this plastic yodeling pickle is EXACTLY what your holiday season needs:

Yodelling Pickle

The reviews are an entertainment all on their own, though several seem to suggest this looks like something OTHER than a pickle, so good luck solving that mystery. ;)

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: