"Satan's Saddest Sperm" Would Be A Great Band Name

Monica asked her baker to add "May the Force be with you" to her son's birthday cake - but added, "If it doesn't fit, don't worry about it."

The end result was a little garbled, but I think you'll agree, INFINITELY funnier:

Yeah, Logan, after all, "hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side."

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Susan named her cake, "Satan's Saddest Sperm."

Aaaaand now I want to see him star in his own Golden Book.

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Outstanding: adjective

1. Exceptionally good: the team's outstanding performance

2. Clearly noticeable: works of outstanding banality

I'd say one of those definitely applies here:

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Ever wonder what the Sorting Hat from Harry Potter does for Halloween?

Personally, I like to think he dresses up as a wedding cake.

COME ON YOU TOTALLY SEE IT, TOO.

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And now, a story:

There once were two friends, both named Doug.

Their friends distinguished the two Dougs by calling them "Black Doug" and "White Doug," respectively. (This is the kind of playful humor, my dear wreckies, that can only occur far, far from internet comment sections.)

When it came time for one of the Doug's birthday, the other Doug ordered him a cake.

This is what happened:

What quackery is this?

Why, it's... WRECKAGE MOST FOWL.

Thanks to Monica G., Susan D., Tina M., Susan W., & Paulina T. for footing the bill. (EH? EH??)

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