It's Worse Than That, They're Dead, Jen

So Jen wants you to think our national parks are all fun and games and kayaking and snuggling baby otters and stuff. Well, we live in Florida, man! We have the Everglades where literally everything wants to kill and eat you. Or kill you and leave your body for something ELSE to eat you. But definitely with the killing thing.

What, you think I'm exaggerating?

THIS ALLIGATOR WANTS TO EAT YOUR FACE.

That's right, a smashed cake alligator wants to kill you. It's serious down here, guys.

And then there's the snakes:

"Help meeeee!"

Which this baker has so helpfully illustrated mid-murder.

We've got poison toads:

"I want you to croak."

And snakes:

GAAAAAAkeepscrollingkeepscrollingkeepscrolling

And giant angry spiders:

Who team up with killer bees...

Did I mention the snakes?

BECAUSE WE HAVE A LOT OF SNAKES.

Not to mention the armies of squirrel-sized mosquitoes:

They're very friendly. No sense of personal space.

Piranhas:

Seriously.

And panthers.

NO LION.

Because of course we have panthers. Why wouldn't we have panthers?! I mean, what would a swamp be without FRIGGIN PANTHERS?!?!?!

So.
To sum up, if you come to one of Florida's many beautiful national parks, you're gonna die. Probably. Best not to chance it. Just go to Disney and marvel at the animatronic deer and bunnies, which are super lifelike this time of year.

This has been a public service announcement from Cheryl G., Kelly V., Tracey S., Anony M., Sarah G., Andrew W., Ashley M., Kelly R., & Gretchen T.

*****

If you know someone who loves frogs, maybe skip the wreck and get them this instead:

Fanatical About Frogs

It's part of a cool animal series with incredible art. In fact I'm also eying Obsessive About Octopuses, just for the cover alone. Hnnng.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Sunday Sweets Finds A Rainbow

Guys, I think we need some rainbows today.

(By Caking It Up)

FOUND ONE!

The watercolor-y drips off the end are my new favorite thing. Well, that and the perfect gold-foil script, because how did they do that.

Most of us are lucky to get a cake that's pretty on the outside, but now there are lucky ducks getting rainbows INSIDE their cakes, too:

(By Carli Milburn, featured here)

OoooOOOoooooh. Lucky bums.

[side eye]

Raise your hand if you just wondered what color this would be on the way out.

But do you recaaaall
the most famous rainbow of all?

(By ChoccyWoccyDooDah)

It is THE RAINBOW, you guys - and I like how the bluebirds and 'bow are the only bits in color.
Perfect homage to that moment when Wizard of Oz went from black & white to color.

And while we're reminiscing about our childhoods:

(By Celebrate With Cake)

HOW CUTE ARE THOSE TINY CARE BEARS?!

True story: one of John's favorite shirts features the "Couldn't-Care-Less Bear." Just like John, it's a bear that tries to act all cool and disaffected, but at the end of the day, is still a big teddy bear.

[blows a kiss in John's direction]

Can't have a rainbow post without My Little Pony's Rainbow Dash, right?

(By ImaginaCake)

Or at least a funky stylized cake version of her.

(I kinda want the different colored strands in her tail to be all different flavors.)

Now, at this point you might be getting the impression that rainbow cakes aren't elegant.

OH HO NOT SO.

(By The Sweet Little Cakery)

These spinny little discs of rainbow goodness are elegance personified, y'all. PERSONIFIED.

Oooh, now check THIS out:

(By Liggy's Cakes)

Look closely; there are little sculpted chameleons!

Sure, you don't generally want creatures crawling out of your wedding cake, but in this case, I think we'd all make an exception.

Here comes my personal favorite this week:

(By Rise and Shine Bakery)

Mere words cannot describe my love for this design... so I'm just gonna make some "gimmie" noises instead.

[grabby hands] *EHHHH!*
*EEEEHH!*
*EHH*

And finally, one more elegant-but-oh-so-cheery rainbow confection that I kind of want to pin in my hair:

(By Cakeium)

Or at least all the flowery parts.

Happy Sunday, everyone!

(Want more? My "Rainbow Connection" Sweets remain some of our most popular, so maybe go check those out.)

*****

P.S. If you liked these I bet you'll like this rainbow wreath I made for John's room:

I used this 84-pc butterfly set from Amazon, which I know you crafters are gonna love:

(3D Butterfly Wall Magnet Set)

They're double-sided and come with both magnets and stickers. Definitely browse the projects in the reviews, there are so many cool ideas - and the set is on sale right now for $9.99!