Wreck Encounters of the Worst Kind

Have you experienced a Wreck Encounter with an Unexplainable Sweet Object (USO)? Watch for these signs!

Wreck Encounter of the First Kind: Visual sighting less than 50 feet away that shows considerable -- albeit completely useless -- detail.

Your guess is as good as mine.

Wreck Encounter of the Second Kind: A physiological effect is manifested, such as confusion or discomfort in the viewer.

*hurk*

Wreck Encounter of the Third Kind: An animated creature is present. These include bipeds,

um... [head tilt]... robots?

and whatever these are:

On the plus side, they don't seem able to breathe our atmosphere.

Wreck Encounter of the Fourth Kind: Direct communication between wrecks and humans.

Shhhh! Don't distract me... I can -- almost -- make it out...

Wreck Encounter of the Fifth Kind: Death associated with an Unexplainable Sweet Object.

Poor Mickey. It was a real blood bath.

(We experts call this "wrecksanguination.")

Wreck Encounter of the Sixth Kind: The creation of a human/USO hybrid.

THE POD PEOPLE ARE COMING.

If you've had a Wreck Encounter with a USO, send Cake Wrecks photographic evidence right away!
(Just don't get caught taking the pictures...)

We WANT to Believe!!!

Out of this world thanks to Anabel J., Cat, Anony M., Mark H., Nate W., Bridget A., & Robert A. for helping prove wrecks are out there. (Um, wait a minute, guys... That's NOT one of the accepted hand gestures...)

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And to shed a little light on your next laptop encounter, how about this astronaut USB light?

You close her visor to turn off the light! BRILLIANT!

And at only $9 Prime on Amazon, it's a STELLAR stocking stuffer. (See what I did there?)

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And from my other blog, Epbot: