Whoaaaa MAN.
[putting on sunglasses]
[lighting groovy cigarette]
[signalling groovy bass player to start groovy bass music]
CAKE!
So sad, bra.
Standing like Santa,
Grilling like gangsta...
I wonder who gives out more
COAL.
[whispering]
As the ephemeral frigidity succumbs to day's full wrath...
My cone melts.
CAKE!
Sad.
Cake.
Dripping like mad
Come back to my pad
I'll make you
a
sprinkle
surprise.
Hey Jane, hand me
that shovel.
Why's it always have to be snakes?
Popsicle.
IN MY FACE.
[blows out candle]
Thanks to Kristin and Gary H., Ashley B., Ellen M., Mab R., Wendy H., Rachel J., & Margot V. We're all snapping our fingers in your direction.
*****
P.S. In case this post wasn't painful enough:
Exceptionally Bad Dad Jokes
There are a lot of "dad joke" books out there, but this one has awesome ratings AND the word "spiffing" on the cover, so it's a clear winner.
******
And from my other blog, Epbot: