Happy VD!

Happy Valentine's Day, my dear Wreckies!

Look, I got you some shoes!

John says they look like big fingernails, but they're actually Valentine high heels.

No, really! See?

VALENTINE HEELS.

I also got you these:

VALENTINE BEAR VAG... er...Vagabonds!

Yep.
Bear vagabonds.

[awkward pause]

So...

B6 Myne?

After all, you guys KNOW U my #2s, right?

And who could pass up a solid #2?

Which reminds me:

This guy did.

Um. Is... is that a snail? Saying "I'm hungry for your heart?"
Why? Do snails eat hearts? Is the curly ribbon so he can strangle you first? Do only the crappy snails strangle you and then eat your heart? Where might one find such cheerfully homicidal mollusks? (Asking for a friend.) And do you really want your Valentine present to evoke these kinds of questions?

I sense I may be "overthinking" it.

Unlike this guy:

HEYOOO!!

Ok, you know what, let's just forget Valentine's Day.
Instead we can spice things up the old fashioned way:

o.0

Dipped in what, Charissa B.?

DIPPED IN WHAT?!?

Thanks to Rebecca B., Kimberly E., Lorene T., Anony M., Jude C., & Charissa B. for keeping it hot, hot, hurk!

*****

P.S. Since this saved my butt during a long painting day recently, I have a random product recommendation:

No Buckle No-Show Stretch Belt

This is my new favorite belt, y'all. It basically turns anything with belt loops into an elastic waist. So comfy I forget it's on, slimline so it doesn't show under my t-shirts, and NO BELT BUCKLE to dig into my belly or unbuckle for bathroom breaks. Woohoo!

You know how stretch jeans are forever sliding down when you sit or bend, so you have to keep hitching them back up? No more! I wear this with all my jeans now. It's entirely elastic, so it moves and stretches with you, zero painful digging. I HIGHLY recommend for anyone well endowed with squish in the belly area.