Guess What

Patty's Checklist, Please

Right, bakers, let's go over the checklist for this week:

Amorphous Purse Dress?

Check.

Yellow Pool Float?

Checkity check.

Bewildered broccoli?

Exxxxxcellent. Better make extras of those.

Plastic Pilgrims?

Remember, if anyone asks, their names are Molly and Seamus.

And last but not least, Oogie Boogie's Money Bag*.

(*Please note this is NOT a euphemism)

PERFECT.

Well, wreckerators, looks like everything's in order! Now let's get out there and write "St. Patty's" on everything to tick off the pedants:

Unless the customer asks for a shamrock.

GO TEAM GO!

Thanks to Ida, Melissa S., Cyndi C., Liza L., Ann G., Shannon K., & Megan H. for making us all feel extra lucky this week.

*****

P.S. Speaking of things that make your head hurt, a friend recently got me this gel cap for my migraines, and sweet icy Stay Puft, y'all, it's amazing:

Migraine Hot/Cold Gel Cap

 I have a huge head and a lot of hair, so it's pretty snug on me, but the extra pressure with the cold is heavenly during a migraine. I used to hold a cold pack and keep shifting it around from side to side, but this wraps my entire skull in a cooling hug. Ahhhh so good.

I keep the gel cap sealed in the fridge all the time now, so I can grab it as soon as a headache starts up. The cold only lasts 15-20 minutes, but it's 1000% worth it in my book, highly recommend.

Artsy Fartsy

[adjusting bow tie] "Welcome, gentle beings, to the grand opening of SplüüRff.

[faint applause]

"All of our works here tonight have been created by world-renowned artists, and are available for sale for far more than you can possibly afford. So, let's begin.

"Our first piece was painted by artist Noh Wei using traditional oils. Her inspiration was taken from the ocean, mother earth, and the organic nature of the gore splatters in Bikini Slasher Kill Zone 4: Revenge of the Waxers"

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"It sells for $490,000.

"Our next piece comes from craftsman Joques Onyu. Joques spent three years in isolation to focus on this masterpiece, during which time he subsisted solely on prune juice and Ranch flavored Bugles."

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"It sells for $893,000.

"The much lauded Yuki Grohs is known for her daring and unconventional techniques. This piece, for example, was constructed using squeeze mayo while the artist was blindfolded and spinning around on a wheelie office chair."

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"It sells for $10 million.

"Another avant-garde darling of the art world, the 'Do' Dude uses his trademark combination of gold leaf and 'personal bodily secretions' to both shock and intrigue viewers."

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"This mixed-media masterpiece sells for 11.2 million.


"Please feel free to browse the rest of our gallery, where you'll find even more distinguished masterworks, such as:

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'Summer Daisies for Janet'

$7.5 million

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'Grilled Cheese Electric Chair'

$27.5 million

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The Existential Possibilities of Finding Lucky Charms in June While Wearing Rubber Galoshes and a Fez'

$17.5 million

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'Texas'

$6.66 million

"And, of course, our most coveted new piece...

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'Coffee Cake with Icing'

$6.00

Thanks to wreckporters Christie R., Aimee W., Alyssa H., Holly L., Laura M., Christy S., Liz C., Anita M., & Stephanie F. for the art attacks.

*****

Speaking of art, anyone remember these?

(Spirograph Design Tin Set)

This is a smaller "travel size" kit that's only $11, but there's also a big deluxe set for a few dollars more. I'm tempted to get one with some neon gel pens and relive my middle school years. :p

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: