Sunday Sweets: Here There Be MONSTERS

It has come to my attention that many people are afraid of monsters.

By CakeCentral Member Tompouse

 But why?

No, really.

Why?

Monsters aren't scary -- they're adorable! In fact, I think you'll agree the monsters you're about to meet aren't terrifying at all; they're just a bunch of cream puffs.

(OK, technically none of them are cream puffs -- but they are baked goods. Close enough.)

 

Let's look at the facts:

This is a One-Eyed, One-Horned, Flying Purple People Eater.

By pt4pastries

 (Check out her wings!)

 Now, a One-Eyed, One-Horned, Flying Purple People Eater only eats purple people. It says so right in her name!

Are you purple?

I rest my case.

 

Then there's the Loch Ness Monster:

Do you know how many people are killed by Scottish lake monsters every year?

Zero.

Do you know how many people are killed by deer every year?

About 130.

So, tell me again why monsters are scary? It's Bambi who's the psycho.

 

"Hang on, what about Cthulhu, the dread horror that lies dreaming in R'lyeh?" you ask.

(Which is kind of silly, because I can't hear you. Still, fair point.)

What, you mean this Cthulhu?

By Geek Sweets

How can you call him anything but sweet? And maybe a little chewy.

 

B.O.B. from Monsters vs. Aliens isn't frightening, either.

By Yummy in the Tummy Cakes

In fact, as a chemically-altered tomato, he's probably a great source of lycopene. 

(Not that that's relevant -- but it is good for your eye. Er, eyes.)

 

I've always thought if Cthulhu and B.O.B. ever got together, their kids would look something like this:

Let's call him Seymour, because of the third eye.
(I told you all that lycopene would come in handy...)

 

Even this guy isn't really scary:

C'mon, haven't you ever played with boats in the tub?

 

Think about it: If monsters are so bad, why do kids like the Wild Things so much?


And if a two-year-old can figure out these monsters are her friends before you can say "Boo"...

By The Royal Bakery

... then how hard can it be?

 

Look at Brobee here. He's just a four-year old drummer who lives in the woods:

By CW reader Yanira Raabe

He's not even remotely dangerous - unless maybe you hug him. (That green frosting can stain.)

 

And while I'll admit I don't know the first thing about Moshi Monsters,

By Little Cherry Cake Company

I think a sweet-tempered, fiercely loyal ninja cat like Katsuma would be a good monster to have living under your bed.

 

So the next time you walk into a room and find a monster ...

By McGreevy Cakes

 ... maybe try asking him out for ice cream instead of running away screaming.

(Hey, my motto's always been, "When in doubt, scoop, don't shout.")

 

Now, can we agree monsters aren't scary?

By Seahorse Sweets

Well, unless maybe you're a cookie.

:D


Have a Sweet to nominate? Then send it to Sunday Sweets [at] Cake Wrecks [dot] com!