8 Christmas Cakes So Bad They're Good (For A Belly Laugh)

'Tis the season to count your wreckage.

1) This cup of "Coco"

2) A Holiday Joint

I think it's an elbow.

3) Gingerbread X-Rays

DANGIT TSA IS NOTHING SACRED

4) Santa?

Even he doesn't know what's on his head.

5) A Cluster Cluck of Wrapping Paper:

Actual Conversation Between Me and John Regarding This Cake:

Me: [zooming in on wrapping] "Um, can you tell what this is?"
John: [squinting] "That's Santa... holding an accordion."
Me: [pause] "Is Santa a chicken?"
John: [longer pause] "Yes, yes he is."

6) Santa's "Sleigh":

I think I deserve a gold medal for figuring this one out, you guys.

7) A Snowman, Probably:

See the scarf and hat?

8) Poo-dolf, the Leech-Nosed Colon Cleaner:

Ho Ho NO.

Thanks to Sherri B., Allie D., Heather G., Surlana, Amelia K., Sydney B., Julie A., & Jeffrey C. for making it rain, dear.

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Watch Your Back, Frosty

The rest of the story is overrated. These seasonal snippets will do.

In a twist of festive irony, Santa later shot his own eye out.

Naturally, all Ralph Lauren cookie covers had to undergo a little "retouching."

Donner blamed Dasher, and Dasher blamed Vixen, but one thing was certain: they would never use the phrase "flipping his lid" again without wincing.

Their escape depended on luck, daring, and the fact that their snowy jailors had no arms.

To be fair, the woman never specified which part of the word to replace with an X.

So he bided his time, knowing someday, somehow, that smug self-satisfied snowman would pay.

Thanks to Kelly W., Matthew Z., Kimberly & Courtney, Joey T., Susan H., & Ann H. for showing us the Far Side of Christmas.

*****

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